Anyway, in celebration of my last day at some nameless corporately owned coffee establishment, I got a manicure and pedicure.

I hate these things; they make me uncomfortable, they hurt and/or tickle, and I usually get hit on by women. This time, the pain was minimal, I was able to withstand minor tickling, and no one hit on me.

In fact, someone who barely spoke English leaned into me and said, “You need eyebrow wax?” Um, no thank you.

What’s wrong with my eyebrows?

I wasn’t, however, able to work my massage chair because, while I may own and operate my own website, use a fancy sewing machine, and make my grandma’s computer print, I cannot work a self-explanatory (or so I’m told) remote control or switch lines on my cell phone.

I usually come away saying, “I could do better than this,” but this time I didn’t. So, thanks for the recommendation, Jenni.

I did, however, find out that my beloved purple amethyst Depression glass actually started out clear. It is only tinged purple due to the lead’s interaction with the sun over the years. This coloring only applies to the very light purple items and not the darker purple varieties (Moroccan? Not real familiar yet.)

This made me a little nervous, but an old lady assured me that there wasn’t enough lead in the glass to cause a user any damage. I hope she’s right. Old ladies are right, right?

I think that the small plates I recently purchased off eBay are “sun purple”. And I think that a large serving plate I won today is actually purple. I can’t say without seeing them, but I think so

I can lift a gigantic bottle of water. That’s right. It took a long time for me to drain one of those giant bottles of water that goes on our water machine, and to be honest, I was hoping that when I did, my parent’s would be in town.

Alas, no. Yesterday, after having worked for 6 hours on the verge of vomiting because no one would pick up their phone, I hauled one of those bottles from the garage, across the kitchen, and turned it upside-down to fix atop the water machine.

Take that. I may not have actual strength, but I have determination.

Of course, after all that hard work, I needed water glasses to put my newly acquired water in.

I thought about getting two sets, but I figure if I progress with this depression glass stuff, one will be sufficient.

Speaking of depression glass, I started my collection this morning via eBay. Before I left for work, I bid on this.

When I came back from work, they were mine. All 6 of them (at least I think 6).

While I was at Target, picking up those glasses, I saw some white salt & pepper shakers in the shape of fish. For some reason, I really liked those… For some horrible, self-deprecating reason. (I’m pretty sure that’s not the right way to use that coupling of words, but you may not know that, so I’m leaving it.)

Jon & Kate Plus 8 continues to amaze me. I don’t care what allegedly happened with various members of their friends and family. Their children seem to be very well behaved and adjusted. They’re endlessly fascinating.

A phone rang seven times during church this evening.

On the way to dinner with my brother, I saw a car like mine with a Hawaii tag. I got pretty excited about that.

Today, I found out that one of my customers was in rodeos for a few years, but never got on a horse. That’s so bizarre. His grandparents, apparently, even raised Arabians. While I’m talking about customers, let’s talk about Susan who makes the neatest things! I wish I had her kind of time.

S.A.M.S.P.A.R.R.O. by, um, Sam Sparro

This weekend, in the life of Meagan, I walked down to the donkey pen to see if I could tempt Henry with some toasted corn…

…but I was distracted by the sound of a golf cart (okay, it makes no sound because it’s electric) headed toward a small herd of angus that had wandered onto our property.

(Uh, did I do the flash wrong on that one?) I thought Dad and Cowboy Cory were going to round them up and herd them on down the street, so I climbed Buddy’s fence and walked purposefully across his pasture toward the cows. Dad and Cory didn’t come, but I didn’t realize they weren’t until I was already there, however my presence caused the cows to scatter (even though there was a fence between us).

As I got to the fence and started taking pictures of the oddly small cattle, Buddy suddenly became interested in me. He ambled over and stole the corn I’d been saving for Henry.

(Yes, it’s corn in that yellow Hello Kitty container.) Then he nudged me, pushed me, and wiggled his oddly dexterous lips at me trying to find more. I climbed up onto the gate to watch the cows graze back toward me, and Buddy stayed with me. Over me, under me, pushing me, laying his large cumbersome head in my lap.

After I sat for a while and got sufficiently dirty, I hopped down and wandered off to the barn. As I approached, Nala, the neighbor’s Weimaraner, started barking at me like she didn’t know who I was.

So, instead of inciting an attack, I stood outside the barn and let Cowboy Cory berate her for her treatment of me. Then, I wandered around the barn and found my first deadly spider. (They are deadly, yeah?)

Dad squashed it. (Black Widow, in case you can’t tell. Click on it and it’ll get bigger. If you’re not chicken.)

It was slightly disconcerting to see that it was in the same stall Mom has been putting the kittens in during the day.

Speaking of the kittens, I returned to the breezeway from the barn and sat down with Alice and Jasper where I related the story of the black widow (and all things before) in a text message. (Apparently it was actually 3.)

Of course, the text was cut short by Alice who plucked a sticker from my jeans and got it stuck in her mouth. I grabbed her and ran in a panic to my mother who did an emergency sticker-ectomy with some tweezers.

That was frightening.

By the way, if someone saw my bare legs today, they’d probably think I was a cutter. The cats are getting heavier and sharper. That’s Pearlie’s biggest complaint: “Those kittens are too sharp.”

Today, I followed Mom back to Dallas to do some fabric shopping. Please note here that I was following my Mom. She passed a car, so I was passing with her. This jerk (it’s coming up) in a silver Pontiac cut in between us. I made sure to give him as much room as he was giving my mother, but he decided to flip me off anyway. Then, he slammed on his breaks so hard that his tires smoked and I could smell them. I honked.

A lot.

Then he did it again. When he got over to the right and I passed him with my mom, I put on my cruise so he could tailgate me all he wanted to appease his roadrage and I wouldn’t hit him.

Sometimes people are just jerks.

But anyway, some of you will be pleased to know that I managed to get her to (She thinks I railroaded because I was able to accomplish this in only one store when she had a list of several to go to. However, because I won, we got to eat at Kabab.) buy fabric for curtains in both back bedrooms. Thus far, there have been no window coverings. And while I’m okay with that while there’s an empty house, I doubted a house and yard full of Thanksgiving (or are we calling it my birthday this year?) guests would appreciate the lack of privacy due to no curtains. For some reason, she doesn’t trust me to finish the curtains. Maybe it’s because of that time I made a 12-square quilt in 9. Who knows. But anyway, I’ll assemble them, she’ll finish, and they’ll be up in time. They’re awesome. I’m just letting you know.

Oh, and then tonight I had a guy lump me with all women everywhere. He made assumptions about me, then told me how I felt, then wouldn’t let me correct him. To top it off, he said he’d pray for me. What’s that about?

Five more days of serving coffee to the most high maintenance people in the world. :) Sometimes I wonder why some of them don’t buy espresso machines and make it themselves. It would be cheaper. But then they’d have no one to gripe at when it came out wrong. Ah, I say it with humor. It’s amusing, but only in a sad, depressing way. Anything someone can control…

Rumor has it, Obama’s going to try to ban handguns. This is lunacy. “And… is the Constitution going to play into that decision at all? I mean, there’s no reasonable reason he should succeed, right?” I don’t know.

In A Little While, the Hanson version

A couple of weeks ago, I determined to go out to a nameless coffee shop and sit between two of the neatest business owners/creators/genius’ probably nearly almost ever. (plug:nectar) As I was sitting, listening to a little borrowed Ray (forgive me for not already owning it), this British guy comes out of nowhere and starts talking about music.

Apparently he’d been doing it all night, but this was the first time I’d seen him.

In the midst of his talking, he looks at my book (The Host by Stephenie Meyer) and comments something to the effect of, “I can’t stand those books!” (By those, he obviously meant the series that has nothing to do with the book I’m still reading.) “She’s so negative about women! Makes them out to be good for nothing but having babies and depending on men!” Oh? Now, the company I was keeping has known me a while, and while I’m staring at this British guy as he babbles about nonsense, they’re laughing a bit. (Well, one is laughing a lot.) The British guy probably thought they were laughing in agreement with what he thought was clearly ridiculous. “All this Bella girl does is have this guy’s kid. Doesn’t even go to college!” When he’s done with his feminist spiel, he says, “Am I right?”

To which I replied, “NO!”

Almost that loudly, too.

After a moment of stunned silence on his part, I had to explain to him that he had just bashed everything I wanted for myself. Then, he went on to explain how his father is a loser and his mother had to scrape to take care of him and his brother. My company gallantly defended the chivalrous nature of gentlemen (and also how interesting it was that he chose to bring this up to probably the only conservative woman he’s ever met).

Um, the end.

One lesson I specifically remember my mom teaching me is that, when you type, you’re to leave two spaces between the concluding punctuation and the beginning of the next sentence. I’ve applied this to text messages. However, yesterday I noticed that if I only leave one space, my phone will automatically make that first letter a capital. My life is so much easier now.

Last week, when I went to the franch, the kittens were not as eager to see me as they were before. It was like two weeks is too long to remember me. They were skittish, and I was afraid my mom was right: it’s time to put them in the barn. But as the weekend wore on, they warmed up quickly.

And I have the claw marks to prove it.

Mom puts them in the barn during the day now, but I’m thankful to the vet who will not vaccinate them for rabies until they’re 3 months or fix them until the 4th. They’re still babies! (Oh yeah, and both girls.)

…babies who’ve grown out of their blue eyes acquired the reflective green ones. KC kept blue eyes. He was a good cat. He also only drank bottled water.

I finally conceded and got myself a new pair of glasses this week. I figured since I’ll be working in an office every day now, I should get another pair just in case. Choosing the glasses wasn’t as much fun as I’d remembered. But interestingly, my prescription this time around is slightly better than when I was 16. I don’t know what that’s about. I guess eye glasses aren’t an exact science. Nevertheless, I don’t have them in yet. But I like them enough.

To wear them when I read.

I made some oatmeal cookies. Did I talk about how I made these, yet? I like them better than chocolate chip. In fact, oatmeal is my favorite cookie. I don’t really care for oatmeal, and after my bout with the GF berry stellas, the mere thought of oatmeal makes me gag. However! These were the first oatmeal cookies made since the introduction of Celiac Disease into my life. They were successful the first try and I love them.

I’ve also taken to putting sprinkles in everything. Who doesn’t like sprinkles? I put them in some of those (GF) Cheerio/peanut butter/M&M/marshmallow square things tonight. What do you call those things? They’re not Rice Krispy Treats, and a little more complicated than Cheerio Treats. Oh well.

Went to see the King Tut exhibit at the DMA on Thursday. It’s good, much better than Hatshepsut. But, go in the Spring when everyone who wants to see it has already been. My favorites were the “animal print” chairs and the canopic jars.

I’m so excited about going to the Canton market again! In addition to the introduction (to me) of amethyst depression glass…

…I also learned you can buy vintage Tupperware!

1) Do I like the amethyst better than the pink? I think I probably do. What is the likelihood of finding a whole set? Or even making a whole set… eventually? I need to settle on a color. Even the jade is nice. But considering purple is my favorite color, and pink is pretty, well, girly and froufrou and entices girls to screech, “Ahh, pink! I love this!” I’m leaning towards not pink.

Oh, and my mom can’t say the word “amethyst”. She says AM ES THIST. What in the world.

2) Grandma uses those canisters for flour, sugar, and stuff, but hers are yellow. This Tupperware dealer had dark blue! A whole set! I’m crazed. If they’re not available next time, I’ll be disappointed.

Speaking of words mispronounced, I learned a new way to say “compromising.” COM. PROMISING. What? That’s right, some guy I work with was talking about how we don’t have any “com promising” standards. I said, “Excuse me, that word is compromising.”

It reminded me of explaining my vocabulary to my Hawaiian coworkers.

Speaking of coworkers and jobs and customers, I’m used to being told I look like someone else. At both of the previous stores I’ve worked at, people would tell me daily, “You look just like Audrey Hepburn!” or whoever else they pictured that day. But I’ve been working at this store for about three months or so and no one has said anything. The closest I’ve come was yesterday when one of my coworkers offhandedly said, “Blah blah blah, you look like that girl from Pirates of the Caribbean.”

Speaking of old customers, people have been getting around lately. This guy from my first store who drives an M6 showed up a couple of weeks ago. Then, a couple of days ago, I’m ringing this woman up and she says, “Didn’t you used to work at (insert name here)?” How did you know that? “I just remember you.” ie. She worked at the nail salon around the corner. ie. Asian women have a frightening attraction to me.

Speaking of Asian women, my last day at this nameless coffee house, I’m going to get a manicure to celebrate the lift of the ban on nail painting! If anyone wants to come, you’re welcome. It’ll be a sight to see. Mostly because I don’t enjoy manicures… But a year and a half of scalding, nasty, milky water seeping into my nail bed needs to be filed away.

There are 4 months worth of Living magazines sitting on my floor that I haven’t looked at. All those ideas just sitting there wasting. I’ve been busy. I also haven’t put my trash out by the curb for 3 weeks. I keep forgetting, and I don’t generate enough trash for it to matter much.

Wow, I could probably waste my whole life away listening through songs iTunes Genius has recommended me.

Buy Ron Paul shirts for your friends for Christmas so that more people know who he is. Maybe do it again next year, too, for when Obama shows his true colors and liberals are looking for someone who can fix the mess (that Obama won’t be solely responsible for, but probably knows nothing about).

How stupid are we?

ps. And I just realized you can buy dark blue vintage Tupperware on eBay much cheaper than from the Tupperware man. Oh well, I’m still excited about it.

Optimistic, Radiohead (or Hanson, if you prefer)

…for whatever I think is going to happen.

Tonight on the way home from church, I stopped at a coffee shop and got a solo short, no whip, half inch of room Signature Hot Chocolate, and ran into a good friend. I sat down for a minute and he told me that he was just reading one of his friend’s blogs who wrote about the neon sign that everyone has above their head. You know, what your presence is saying to the world.

Mine is, “Is it over yet?” or, “Are we done yet?”

Over the years, this has meant a lot of different things. Recently it’s been meaning 1) “Am I done with this ridiculous job yet?” 2) “Isn’t this election over yet?” and 3) “Hasn’t the economy crashed so I can move to the country yet?”

This is probably not a good way to live my life, but I’ve never lived in the moment. Oh well.

grandma: “Do you remember the calves? We had sheep, too, but that was before you were born. April only had them one at a time. Can you still call them sheep then? You can’t call it a shep… Sheep doesn’t sound right.”

I went to Kabab for lunch! I haven’t been since Uncle Keith’s meeting. I walked in and this strange man tried to seat me. I gave him a funny look, then walked to my usual seat. Then I saw the owner’s son and asked about him, and he said this guy has been around a while. I guess I just haven’t seen him.

That was kind of a boring story, huh?

But gasp! I ate there by myself, and read my book. :)

I’ve been watching a new Dugger Family special on TLC tonight. That family’s so neat. Going on 18 kids, I believe.

6 Degrees of Separation from the Dugger’s: me, my dad, Edwin Viera, Meredith Viera, The Duggers!

This weekend (among other things I did) I fulfilled life-long dream #2 (#1 being the 4th of July thing) of going to a haunted house! I’ve never been because my lame friends won’t go with me. (That’s right, lame, like an old horse.) But James did, and it was awesome!

Not so much scary, but fun. I think I want to be in one next year. I wonder how I can pull that off.

(Okay, so I went one other time at FC, but that doesn’t count because FC is alternate reality.)

Wii Music! Neat!

ps. I’m sorry, Jenny. I, uh, meant to call you. But I, uh, drowned my phone. That last part is true.